10 quotes on friendship that makes you reevaluate your circle

Who are your friends and what makes your friends your friends?

Hey! My name is Anika and if you're anything like me, the topic personal connection including friendships fascinates you. What particularly sparks to me is how much potential a good friendship has in terms of helping each other grow, pass difficult times or simply create amazing memories and stories. 

I have spent a lot of time gathering information by observing, listening and reading about relationships advice from experts. Here are some quotes that I should have listened to earlier that might be interesting to you too!

Side Note: If you read these again reflecting on yourself instead of on your friends you'll get the maximum out of this article

1. “"CHOOSE your friends"

As if there would be line of people waiting for to be your friend. Pick them like berries, good ones to the basket. When you are lonely enough, you let them to choose. Be selective with who you put yourself around is important.

2. “Make friends with people who want the best for you” - Jordan Peterson

When you tell them that something good happened to you, observe their reaction. If they genuinely seem happy or want to celebrate it with you, you can call that a friend. Signs of envy, bitterness and disinterest are easy to spot if you look out for them. They actually want to listen to you instead talking about themselves how they once did something better.

The same thing applies if something bad happens to you. They should want to listen to you and be empathetic. If they are truly your friend, they should feel bad when something bad happens to you and attempt to be helpful make you feel better. If that's not the case: walk away.

 

 

3. “You should never have anyone in your life who takes more joy out of your life than brings into it.” - Jordan Peterson

Weigh the positives and negatives and check if people are actually worthy of your time and energy. If someone doesn't add value to your life, what's the point?

4. “Don't ignore small signs of betrayal"

I have read about someone that worked with Michael Jordan describing a situation in the office. They were having a short break and having fun shooting paper balls into the trash can. They've been laughing and just trying to score casually while Michael was described to look very focused, concentrated and competitive.

People do the big things as they do small things. In this case, his behaviour is what made him one of the top basketball players of all time.

Remember this when you notice something odd and don't ignore the red flags!

5. “You're not morally obliged to go down with someone else's ship” - Jordan Peterson

If someone is on a downward path and you've done your best, sometimes all you can do is detach yourself.

In the extreme case, you feel that the other person doesn't want to get better or your help. What that want is a companion that makes them not feel alone in their boat of misery. 

Sometimes someone asks you for help and advice, thenyou invest your time and energy only to find out that their actions seem to ignore all of that. 

Always take care of yourself first, you are not responsible for someone elses misery.

6. “Do not cast your pearls before swine” - Jordan Peterson

Talking about wanting to help others:

This saying has different versions: “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs."

But all of them come down to stop offering your words.

"If you offer your words of wisdom to someone in a genuine attempt to help and they treat that with contempt: Shut up!" 

7. “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” - Jim Rohn

If you open your Whatsapp now: WHO do you spend time talking to?

You can't surround arrogant people and not be arrogant.

If you spend time with unfulfilled people that complain all the time, you are most likely unfulfilled people and complain all the time.

If you spend time with confident and striving people, you are most likely a confident and striving person.

You are who you hang around!

8. “Show me your friends and i'll show you your future.” - 

Surround yourself with people with a mindset that you want. Even if they haven't reached their goals, if you're striving together, they will hold you accountable to keep moving forward. They can pull you back on track when you get off track.

Ultimately the people who you place yourself around are going to be your support system once you do get to your destination.

9. "Add one new winner friend and cut one looser friend. Yeah I know he's been your boy since 4th grade but he sits at home and fucking smokes weed all day. You can only love him so much." - Gary Vaynerchuk

This one goes hand in hand with the last two quotes, just puts it in context. 

10. “Hire Fast, Fire Faster” - Jim Rohn

I like applying this one to my relationships. Don't be scared to to go out and invest your time meeting NEW people. Get out of your scarcity mindset that there is only a certain number of people in your town, etc. Meet the maximum amount of people possible!

When it comes to spending more time with these people, be fast when you see the red flags. Your intuition is wise, trust it and stop hanging out with people that give you weird vibes. There are plenty of people that you haven't met yet that possibly can contribute a lot more than your current circle.

In conclusion, true friends will bring out the best in you. They have your back in difficult times by making you feel understood and helping you out. They inspire, motivate and support you to always do better. To have true friends, you need to be a true friend first. This is how you will attract likewise people in your life. Friendship is reciprocal, you want to give without expecting something in return. 

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